“Audre Lorde argues throughout her work that we should not be protected from what hurts. We have to work and struggle not so much to feel hurt but to notice what causes hurt, which means unlearning what we have learned not to notice. We have to do this work if we are to produce critical understandings of how violence, as a relation of force and harm, is directed toward some bodies and not others.”

— Sara Ahmed, The Promise of Happiness (via kitduckworth)

Indian Hair Jewelry

one of my friends on facebook just said if the cinemas never reopen the last film he ever saw would be the sonic movie and i realized ‘that’d be a fun game’, rb this with what yours would be in the tags

people who are overperformative about their wokeness or a tragedy online are always like “if you can reblog everything but this im blocking you” or something along those lines bc they dont have the self awareness to realize that not everyone comes on tumblr to fucking mourn let alone get their news from like they do…lol

“why is no one talking about this” there are other platforms like…substantial ones other than tumblr.edu where you can get information and i hate to break it to you but you really are not more of a morally conscious person for sprinkling in a few current events posts on your blog scream

Sure, relationships typically start with a honeymoon phase that then grows into something deeper but a bit more mellow if things work out, but it’s depressing as fuck that this has turned into a really, really common script for straight relationships that says it’s totally normal and inevitable for dudes to just become more and more emotionally checked out of the relationship, and leave it to their girlfriend/wife to perform if she wants to get even a crumb of affection from him. I’m so fucking tired of seeing women constantly being taught that decades of emotional neglect is just our lot in life.

what “getting out of the honeymoon phase” should mean: you aren’t joined at the hip anymore and can spend time apart, but you still greatly enjoy eachother’s company and deliberately make time to be together. you’re not just a unit, you’re a matched set (like, you’re susan and bob rather than susanandbob). you start to see eachother’s flaws and don’t put eachother on a pedestal but instead love eachother as human beings, flaws and all.

what it should NOT mean: you barely talk anymore. you feel like two completely different people, tied together by a frayed thread. you’re annoyed by eachother’s flaws and don’t like to be around eachother

similarly: “relationships are hard, they take a lot of work” means that cooperation on a daily basis in both the practical and emotional realms takes conscious effort. you can’t coast on those honeymoon feelings forever, and you aren’t psychic, so you have to pay attention and communicate so you can honor each other’s wants and needs.

it should not mean that you’re fighting every two days or walking on eggshells to avoid the anger of an unreasonable partner or breaking your back trying to get the slightest sign of affection or respect from someone who’s checked out and doesn’t care about you.

This is so, so important. Dont keep investing in a relationship thats not giving back. You deserve to be heard, you deserve at the very least communication.

i don’t mean to sound fake deep but the reason 2018 felt so long was because we’re being fed what’s trending at such a rapid rate that we literally can’t remember half of the shit that even happened anymore. “Black Panther came out in February!” Marvel releases so many movies a year that we completely forget about the last movie as soon as a new one comes out and it repeats in a vicious cycle. “Tide Pods/Ugandan Knuckles was in January!” The life span of memes have been rapidly declining for years and it’s gotten to the point where the average lifespan of a meme is about 2 weeks and then the next thing gets popular and then that lasts for 2 weeks and it just keeps going. We’re literally losing our sense of time because of our rapid consumption of media and pop culture.

Soft endearments in Urdu: jaan-e-man (heart’s beloved), bulbul (nightingale), humraaz (literally secret-sharer; confidante), pritam (beloved), jaan-e-bahar (beloved of the springtime), pardanasheen (veiled one), sona (golden one), yaar (friend/lover), natkhat (mischievous one)

send me a ☕️ and an opinion (popular or unpopular) and i’ll say whether i agree or disagree

getting in trouble or being outed for being racist / antisemitic / transphobic etc is not the same as being bullied

guess who’s ten away from her next hundred and would kiss everyone if they reach it before valentines day ends